Just a Number

Today, my older sister turned eighteen. She's a superstar in every possible meaning or interpretation of the word, and I wanted her to feel extra-special on her Big Day. I bought her a pink sash at Claire's that says "Birthday Princess" on it that she wore around all day. She's very tacky in a quite endearing way (I think it works for her because she's so small), so the sash was not particularly out of the ordinary for her. I don't want this to turn into one of those annoying OMG-I-love-my-sister-more-than-anything-we're-BFFs-luv-u-sis because then I would have to vomit everywhere. I have a big problem when people cross the line from sentimental into sappy territory. The latter is just gross.

My sister also has a funky sense of style. All in all, she rox.

[Photo by me.]

I took this photo of her last summer when we went to Venice Beach in California. Her dress was made out of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles bedsheets, and her hat was originally purchased because she has extremely sensitive skin. It ended up being a really bangin' hat and a valuable investment. 

Happy birthday biddy! 

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Inspired By A Human: Michelle Obama

I wouldn't be the first to say that I love Michelle Obama. I don't know much about many First Ladies throughout history, but I have reason to believe she's definitely one of the coolest. Some people get down on her for a variety of reasons, most of them inconsequential when we think about the fact that we are ALIVE and all of us are fragile human beans. It's one of those days, as you can see. Tuesdays are my Existentialism Days. (I just made that up.) 

I digress. Back to the First Lady. After retyping her title, I realized how fitting it truly is. She is a lady of many firsts. I think above all, she is a lady of action. She does stuff, instead of merely talking about doing stuff. She changed the food pyramid to a plate, because no one's food is stacked in the shape of polyhedron. Also, sustenance should not be hierarchized. She makes appearances at award shows generally reserved for Hollywood celebrities (see final picture). She dresses herself and her family in clothing the upper-middle class could afford. She advocates for healthy living and promotes balanced diets and exercise, especially for children and teens. She has a J.D. from the Harvard School of Law. She's revolutionizing what it means to be the First Lady; women in her position are no longer just figureheads, they are leaders in their own right. Hillary Clinton was also a true First Lady, but Michelle is a bonafide role model for women everywhere. She represents an attainable ideal of a woman we can all admire: she's intelligent, she works hard, she takes care of her family, she isn't unnaturally thin, and she's a pioneering thinker. I know that may seem like the opposite of what I said, that she's so all around good at everything that it's impossible to emulate Michelle Obama. But think about it this way: she got to where she is today by being all of those things that I listed, not by being a pretty doll on display for public consumption. There's nothing wrong with using natural beauty to one's advantage, but it can only get you so far. If there's anything I learned from reading The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde it's that beauty fades inevitably, but intellect and sincerity and kindness do not. That's what I feel that Michelle embodies. 

Also, she always looks effing awesome. 

[Photos via Harper's Bazaar and Google.]

Jason Wu, April 2009

Dancing it out on "Late Night with Jimmy Fallon"

Kai Milla at a White House event honoring Stevie Wonder in 2009

J.Crew, April 2009

Michael Kors, September 2010

Naeem Khan

Oscar de la Renta, 2009

Peter Soronen, February 2009

Peter Soronen, May 2010

Thakoon, April 2009

Naeem Khan, Academy Awards of 2013

Happy Tuesday. Is it just me, or is it HELLA HOT OUTSIDE?

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Gala-vanting

I didn't mention it at the time, but I was fairly disappointed with the outfits at last year's Met Gala. Therefore, my hopes weren't very high when I began scrolling through photos of celebrities' outfits from this year's event on Harper's Bazaar. The exhibit is called "Punk: Chaos to Couture," and celebrates--you guessed it--punk fashion. That made me a little bit nervous. Punk can either be really good, or really god-awful. I was worried people would take it too seriously and show up with mohawks and septum rings. 

As it turns out, there were a ton of fine-lookin' people at the Met the other night, way more than I expected. I'm not really sure why this happened; maybe everyone was more inspired by punk than Prada? Who knows. The only thing that's certain is that the Olsen twins are freakin' awesome. 

[Photos via Harper's Bazaar.]

Ashley Olsen in Dior Couture

You see what I mean? Tangerine fairy. Done.

Florence Welch in Givenchy by Ricardo Tisci

Cowboy dominatrix with the voice of a vibrating angel. 

Giovanna Battaglia in Dolce & Gabbana 

Despite the controversy over Dolce & Gabbana's Spring 2013 collection, Giovanna Battaglia looks like an Italian queen.

Anne Hathaway in Valentino

Anne goes blonde???? I don't know what to do. I don't know how to respond. I guess my first response is "yes.....???"

Kirsten Dunst in Louis Vuitton

I don't really understand her dress, but it's so intriguing that I couldn't not include it.

Lauren Santo Domingo in Dolce & Gabbana

There's something so classically beautiful about this dress that makes me long for days when wearing gowns every day was acceptable. I'm not really sure what time period I'm referring to but I'm sure it existed. 

Mary-Kate Olsen in Chanel Couture, vintage Balmain, and Louis Vuitton

Yes. Yes. Yes. You are a queen, Mary-Kate. 

Miley Cyrus in Marc Jacobs

I can't say I enjoy Miley Cyrus very much (although I do have a CD signed by her in my room...oh, fourth grade, what a crazy time you were), nor do I dig her hair very much, but her dress was ultra-punk in only a way that Marc Jacobs could make it. 

Rooney Mara in Givenchy by Ricardo Tisci (with the designer)

I always feel like Rooney Mara is silent. Like she never opens her mouth to speak, she just stands there looking awesome and sealing her lips with dark lipstick.

Sarah Jessica Parker in Giles, with Phillip Treacy hat

Funky.

Constance Jablonski in Wes Gordon (with the designer)

I enjoy dog collar dresses as much as the next girl.

Dakota Fanning in Rodarte

Dakota, Dakota, how I adore your wardrobe.

Alexa Chung in Erdem

I don't think I even need to reiterate my feelings towards Alexa Chung.

Allison Williams in Altuzarra

Girls will be girls. (See what I did there?)

Hanneli Mustaparta in Calvin Klein

Hanneli does it again. Peep the arm band. It's like a choker for your...arm.

And that's a wrap. I just dropped my computer on the floor because I am a spazhands (VERY different from jazz hands) and now I must pray bi-daily (is there another word for this?) that my dear Sherica doesn't do something bad.

Two days. You can do it! ~Si se puede~ (I don't speak Spanish)

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Birkenstocking

I made a bag in seventh grade that says "I LOVE SHOES" on it. I don't think I actually loved shoes at the time (that was still in my shlumpy elastic-waistband-jeans-and-the-same-sweatshirt-everyday phase), but now I can wear that bag un-ironically. I really do love me some good shoes. I'm not a footwear-hoarder (ie Leandra Medine), but I definitely have my fair share of foot coverings. I'm the sort of person that gets a good pair of shoes and wears them every day for weeks, months, or years. I like to spread the love around, but honestly, not all shoes are created equal. Some are infinitely better than others. That's how we end up with holes in the heels of our boots, thus resulting in wet socks and that weird squishy feeling that ants have set up camp between your toes and have started blasting TNT except their TNT is just made of mushy water. Because they're ants. 

In other non-insect-related news, Birkenstocks. Yes, that's all I was gonna say. Have a good night. 

No, come back, I was kidding! The truth of the matter is, Birkenstocks are becoming--wait for it--HIGH FASHION. Yes, yes, yes, it's really truly happening. The infamous middle aged man's footwear of choice has officially graced the runways of the world. If your mind has not been blown by now, you should read that sentence again and hope for a better reaction. 

Here's my theory (but what does my theory really matter? Like, I'm just some chick sitting on her couch, taking a break from studying for an AP history exam (which I'm studying for by watching episode after episode of Crash Course, you should try it, John Green is fantastic) by blogging, a task which she has neglected for far too long and is quickly realizing how much she loves and misses the simplicity and enjoyment of casually-formally ranting about absolutely anything and having random people read it. Does my opinion actually mean anything? Does anything actually mean anything? Is anything real? Do I exist? What is happening? My mom thinks I should stop reading Kerouac for a while because doing so causes things like this to happen.). I think that we've spent so much time--us, the collective ~human race~ over the course of history--forcing ourselves to do things we simply don't want to do, and have only done them because everyone else was doing it (vicious cycle ensues), ie wearing really uncomfortable shoes, that we've finally realized that life is too short to walk around in stilettos all the time just so your legs supposedly look longer. The best people in the world don't really care about the length of your legs, but rather the substance of your mind. So you should be able to wear frickin' Birkenstocks if you like. I would like to take this moment to reiterate what is perhaps the thesis of this blog, if there is such a thing: fashion is not about clothing, or trends, or materialism, or capitalism, or anything like that. It's about self-expression and what you think is rad, and how you like to tell people what you think is rad. End scene. 

Some of the examples of Birkenstock-like sandals on the runways were in menswear collections, so  a few names might be unfamiliar. I had to go deep, deep down into the underwater trenches of the abyss-like Internetz to find some of these references, so don't complain about their obscurity. That's what the Internet was made for, to expose the vast obscurity of everything. (Okay, maybe my mom is right.)

Photos via the vast and obscure Interwebz. 

Dries van Noten Menswear S/S 2013

You really can't get any tackier than camouflage pants and mandals with python and camo accents, as well as traction soles. 

Givenchy Menswear S/S 2013

Sometimes your feet just need to be free and fancy at the same time.

Agi & Sam Menswear S/S 2013

He is, in fact, a runway model. He looks like an eccentric Middle Eastern prison-inmate-cum-beachside-smoothie-vendor, but I really really like it. 

Miu Miu S/S 2013

Miuccia Prada made flat shoes??? What is happening to everything???

Marni S/S 2013

Very simple, yet so elegant. It's like not wearing shoes, except without looking like you're wearing futuristic toe-socks. 

Céline S/S 2013

The famous fluffy (I keep typing "fluffly," can that just become the official spelling?) Céline sandals. What more can I say that they have not already said themselves?

Robert Piqueras S/S 2013

Those are actually glitterfied Reebok sandals. I kid you not. 

Rochambeau S/S 2013

Desert wanderer enters Los Angeles by accident, stumbles into a mall first thing, and emerges looking like an amalgamation of a cowboy, a high strung intern at a fashion magazine, and MC Hammer.

Araks S/S 2013

Another simple version of the sandal, this time taking a bit of an Addams family tone. 

What is the verdict, dear readers? Are you ready to embrace your inner tackiness and show the world the true meaning of comfort, or are you unable to wrap your head around the concept that your dad was doing it right all along? Or something in between? Tellme. One word.

That's all, my eyes are half asleep (yes, just the eyes, the rest of me is quite awake), I am leaving, good night.

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