Can I Have Your Closet: Alina Peña

Alina Peña is a rock and roll fairy. I think that's the most succinct way to describe her. I met her in my gym class, a class notorious for its fashion-diminishing quality. However, Alina is capable of dressing like a cool-as-fuq chick even when we're sweating and awkward in the uncomfortable environment that is a high school physical education course. From the first day I saw her, wearing her over-sized, high-waisted sweatpants, funky t-shirts, and old-skewl sneakers, I knew we had to be friends. And it turns out she's just as awesome as her clothes proclaim her to be. She's a fellow passive aggressive feminist and Rookie lover, as well as having her own unique thangs that she does. She makes zines, terrariums, and pins, and has the most amusing Tumblr I've ever seen. She always has what is seemingly fairy dust sprinkled delicately across her cheekbones. But most importantly, she has her own unique style that is just so Alina, but at the same time so difficult to pin point. Basically, she can rock everything, and totally will if given the chance. Without further ado, I present to you, Miss Alina. 

Odelia: How would you describe your style?

Alina: I knew you were gonna ask this! It's kind of a bit of an adventure 'cause I can't make any decisions whatsoever, it's just kind of an emotional roller coaster when I try and answer that question. But I don't know, it depends on the day. Sometimes I wanna be a go-go girl, sometimes I wanna be a rockabilly rebel, it just depends.

Odelia: Who are your fashion icons and who do you admire aesthetically?

Alina: Tavi Gevinson and Petra Collins are my queens, but I don't really know people, it's really bad. It's usually just old children's books, art deco children's books that I read, or photos from the sixties that I see on Pinterest and other pretentious things like that that usually are inspiring.

Odelia: Where are your favorite places to shop?

Alina: I was asking myself this the other day, 'cause I have a lot of clothing, and I don't know where it comes from! When it's me, myself, and I, it's usually just thrift stores, and the Salvation Army, and things like that, or vintage shops, but my mom does a lot of shopping for me, 'cause she's really good at that. She gets all these emails with coupons and goes back to stores to see if things are on sale, yeah. And it's all from, like, Century 21, and it all rocks. She does a lot of shopping for me.

Odelia: If you could own one or more items right now that you don't have, what would it or they be?

Alina: Ugh, I feel like I should name drop something! I really want this jacket I saw on Etsy that's red, white, and blue, and it says “Love” on the back, and it's all fringe, and it's really wild with like, hearts on it. I also want some pins. I just wanna be the kind of person that has pins all over their chest, on your butt, like, anywhere. Pins on my face. I just want lots of broaches. It's mostly pins, but then a few bug broaches here and there.

Odelia: Would you say that fashion is a big focus in your life?

Alina: Jesus Christ, yeah. It's a problem.

Odelia: How would you describe personal style as a concept?

Alina: Personal style as a concept?

Odelia: Like what does it mean to you.

Alina: I think it's just all of the inspiration that you gobble up and spit up however you like. It can change as much as you want, you don't really have to be pinned down, that's why it's so difficult to talk about, I guess.

Odelia: How do you feel that high school has influenced your sartorial choices?

Alina: I've always cared way too much about how I dress, but have always kind of been on-trend whether I want to or not. But I guess it's kinda pushed me a lot because people are super crazy fashionable in high school, and I'm so defensive about it, I feel like I have to be the best. It's been a good motivator.

Odelia: But there's also a lot of people that are really nastily dressed. It's kind of disheartening.

Alina: Yeah, that's true. I don't mind it too much.

Odelia: I'm that person that gets angry.

Alina: I don't know, it depends. It honestly depends. If I really hate it [the outfit], or I have something against the person, then I'll criticize them for it, and if I like them, I'll be like, “She can do whatever she wants, it doesn't matter, don't judge her!” So, I don't know. I don't really mind either way, as long as I feel like I look good! [Laughs]

Odelia: Okay, I'm throwing in a bonus question in reference to your scene days, but not really. Do you feel like your style evolves frequently, or is there a core Alina thing?

Alina: No, it changes all the time. It's so difficult for my mother when she wants to buy me things for Christmas 'cause she doesn't know what I'm into anymore. I mean, I'll get nostalgic for things I had when I was five, but there's not much holding it together other than, I guess, being really quirky. I guess that's a really core part of me. But otherwise I'm all over the goddamn map.

Odelia: Is there anything else you want to say?

Alina: Uh, I wanna be you when I grow up. [Laughs]

Odelia: This is funny, because she's older than me. So it's physically impossible.

Alina: [Makes kissy face at camera]

[Photos by me.]

Look at that magic. She really is shimmering. 

I learned all about the pure genius of layering tights from Alina. 

She and our friend Julianne wear their Growlers pins erryday. They're just big Growlers fans, I guess.  

Her bangs were probably the best decision she's ever made. Not many people can rock the midi-bangs (half way between micro bangs and regular bangs), except maybe Alina, Rooney Mara, and Tavi Gevinson. All of this Googling of bangs has made me really want to get bangs again, but make them midi-length this time. Please do all that is in your power to talk me out of this. I will regret it. So much. 

What even is this pattern??? Pastel fairy vomit??

Whadda shmerp. 

This fancy lady is supercute and quite fashionable. Nothin' you didn't already know. 

There may be a few weeks in between this "Can I Have Your Closet" and the next one, seeing as I don't have any lined up as of this moment. However, I have a few subjects in mind, so don't think this segment is going on a massive hiatus the way it did last time. Also, there will be more Fashion Week coverage coming your way as soon as I can find the time to write things up, plus there's a bunch of fancy projects going on behind da scenes here. Stay tuned! (I never really understood that phrase, because it literally means to adjust to the frequency of a required signal, so it doesn't even make sense in a television or radio context nowadays.) 

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On Annie Hall and Evolution

About a year ago, I made a tiny little baby-sized reference to Annie Hall that at the time I didn't fully understand because I hadn't seen the movie until last night. I decided to watch it once and for all (because Amélie isn't on Instant Play, nor is any other movie on my to-watch list) on some shady free movie site (okay, it wasn't that shady, it just was taking forever to buffer at the beginning so I'm a little sour about that). I hadn't seen any Woody Allen films aside from Midnight in Paris, so I figured it was about time I saw one of his most classic movies.

All of that was just fluff. The point is: I watched Annie Hall last night, and it made me realize something. It was an idea that had been floating around my mind for months, but I couldn't really find a solid foundation for it. I couldn't write about it if I didn't have anything substantial to say. But while watching this movie, I finally figured a little piece of it out. This sproutlet of a postulation was on the subject of the importance of the evolution of one's personal style. Note: be forewarned that you are about to digest an unjustifiable amount of sentences in the subjunctive.

I'm a firm believer of change. If something isn't working, then, by golly, you do what must be done so that it works! This is a very broad opinion that could be applied to many aspects of life, but let's focus in on its relevance to fashion, seeing as this is a fashion blog, or whatever. When I was in middle school, I dressed like a complete dope. I wore elastic-waist-band jeans and the same Long Beach Island sweatshirt everyday all throughout seventh grade, and seventh grade was my least horrible year of middle school. I've never been to Long Beach Island. I don't even know if it exists. My repulsive sloppiness was mostly due to my nonexistent confidence, which was due to being very overweight. In eighth grade, however, things began to turn around. I started shopping at Urban Outfitters (you all remember how I gushed and gushed about that place in the early stages of this blog, don't you?) and I began actually selecting what I wanted to wear to school instead of throwing on whatever nasty hoodie was nearest me. All of a sudden, I got compliments from people on a skirt that I was wearing, or a top, and eventually whole outfits. By the time I had started wearing my mom's old clothes on a regular basis (because they finally fit me), I had established an unspoken reputation as a "fashionable" person. Few people remembered or commented on the fact that just a year before it was a big deal for me to take off that Long Beach Island sweatshirt that my cousin had received someone's bar mitzvah in 2006. I had changed, and it was awesome. That was around the point at which I began this blog. And that was another huge change, but that's a whole different story.

People talk all the time about how one's teenage years are an important time for exploration, and I'm not going to deny it. I can tell you from current experience that if I had stayed the same person I was in seventh grade, everything would seriously suck. The (possibly only) great thing about adolescence is that we're given an opportunity to transform. It's like a widely accepted thing that we're allowed to do. When we're adults, if we suddenly started dressing like a Wiccan princess elf, people will wonder what the hell happened. If I did that now (seriously considering it), people would just say, "Oh, she's exploring. She's a teenager." If I just so happen to decide that I really, really enjoy dressing like a Wiccan princess elf, then that is just fine and dandy. Perhaps that will be how I dress for the rest of my life, if I deeply connect to my inner Wiccan princess elf. Which I might. While we're supposing things, imagine that one day, or over a series of days, I come to the conclusion that I don't identify as strongly with my inner Wiccan princess elf as much as I used to. I shouldn't be forced to remain as I am if I am uncomfortable that way. Evolution is normal--nay, necessary, at all levels of life. If you don't believe me, ask Charles Darwin. He knows a great deal about all of this evolution business. Personal adaptation is therefore completely normal and necessary. One's outward appearance is apt to change, especially if he or she expresses themselves through clothing, or, in other words, if their outer self reflects their inner self.

Think back to the end of Annie Hall, when Annie and Alvy break up. (Don't worry, I didn't just spoil the whole movie for you if you haven't seen it. This much is mentioned within the first three minutes of the film.) Annie moves to California and leads a more relaxed lifestyle, one more suited to her character. Alvy, on the other hand, stays in New York, doing exactly what he had been while he was still with Annie, although now he is also ruminating over his lost relationship. When they meet again in California, Annie is the happier of the two because she became more herself. Alvy didn't recognize that he had the ability to change, and therefore did not.

If no one else has told you, I'll be the one to say it (again): changing is not bad. Now that this has officially become Chicken Soup For the Soul, I'll just keep going. Different is not bad, either, and is generally freaking awesome. Let's continue with my Wiccan princess elf example. I know it's extreme, but it helps prove the point, ya know? If I were to actually start dressing as such, I would probably freak out everyone I know (at least for a little while). They might ask me what happened that caused me to look like a phantasmagorical creature witch queen. If I say nothing and proceed to try and cast spells on them in Elvish, I might scare and/or annoy them. Unless I am actually casting Elvish spells on them, they can just deal. They'll get used to it eventually if these friends are keepers. But before my peers can acknowledge that this change is necessary, I have to concede to this as well. Switching up the way I dress isn't being dishonest to my style or even myself; it's quite the contrary. If I were to wear the same clothing my entire life, that would probably be more untruthful. At first, it may seem like I am copying others, and I might be. Over time, all of these various personas and identities will all come together to form a truer version of myself, because no one else will have the same amalgamation of inspirations and sources that I will. Now would be a good time to let Tavi Gevinson articulate this further: "If you're sick of how you dress, keep an eye out for clothes that remind you of the images that have caught your eye and your heart, and you'll create your own style by feeling like you've internalized and made part of yourself all the things you really love through these clothes that hold personal references and memories."

Annie Hall does play a role in all of this, I swear. While watching the movie last night and seeing the classic Annie outfit (see above), I felt an urge to start wearing high-waisted dress pants and ties with partially buttoned vests. And in the next scene I wanted to wear whatever she was wearing. I started going through my wardrobe in my head, determining what was plausible and what was not. After the initial moments of interest, it became less about wanting to look like Annie and more about evaluating her influence on me. I like the way she dresses, and I want to like the way I dress. In order for me to do that, however, I can't become someone else, because that person is not me (duh). I have to take Annie's style in, chew it up, digest it, and it will mix in with every other source of inspiration in my life. All of these ideas form a nice big stew in my brain, and as long as I keep adding ingredients, the flavor will change.

 [Photo via Google images.]

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We Are All Rookies

If you can remember back to about a million years ago (read: September), you may remember that I mentioned in my fun lil' video that Octavia and I went to the Rookie Mag Yearbook One launch at McNally Jackson on a Sunday night during Fashion Week. That Sunday I'd gone to Lela Rose in the morning, bought some snazzy-as-hayl hot pink running shoes (I KNOW)--a process which took nearly an hour and a half, and of course I ended up buying the pair I had initially tried on--crashed at Lola's crib for a while and did what is always done at other peoples' houses: absolutely nothing, and then met good ol' 'Tavia (whoa, unintentional wordplay because of the existence and relevance of Tavi Gevinson in this post) down in SoHo for the book launch. Before I continue, I would like to point out that I just used three different sentence-splicing punctuation forms in one painfully long run-on. Back to mon histoire. 

Octavia and I had missed the Rookie Road Trip New York stop because she was unaware that it was happening and I was way on the other side of the country, and we both cried internally for weeks. Naturally, when she told me about this event, I shouted, "YES!" so loud at my phone (note: I wasn't having a phone conversation...it was a text message) that my mom thought I had said "ow" and was very concerned that I was seriously injured. I had no idea what to expect, so I wasn't dressed as quirkily and Rookie-ish as I would've liked. You'll see in a minute how fuqin' amazing everyone was dressed. Petra was wearing high-waisted bell bottoms with perfectly frizzed out hair. Amy Rose was wearing an apron. Tavi looked like she had stepped out of Junya Watanabe's mind into the Valentino Spring 2012 collection and then Apparated to McNally Jackson. Even Octavia was dressed perfectly (when is she not, though?) in a band tee shirt (maybe it was The Smiths? We were/are in a huge Smiths phase. Edit: it was Duran Duran), a yellow floral A-line skirt, and I believe a pair of red Supergas. Octavia, if you are reading this, now you know just how creeptastically I stalk your outfits. 

I can't even begin to express how extraordinary that night was. I literally cannot find a word in the dictionary app on my computer that can describe how much love I felt from everyone in that room and how much I felt that THESE ARE MY PEOPLE. Because people that read and write Rookie are honestly the most amazing people I have ever met. They are so supportive of the mere existence of everyone around them when surrounded by fellow Rookies that it is simply mind-blowing. I cannot count the number of times Octavia and I made eye contact throughout the night with that look of, "oh my God, why is everyone here so perfect and why can't we all just combine to be an awesome blob of greatness" that can only be validated by the presence of Tavi Gevinson and her compatriots and followers. 

I had only discovered the beautiful creation that is Rookie Mag last June, during a particularly terrifying chapter of school/everything. Prepare yourself for the cliché meter to hit 11. When I was feeling uninspired to write, blog, draw, interact with people, read, make collages, peruse the Internet, or even sleep (who is ever uninspired to sleep? That is just the most ridiculous statement ever made in the history of forever, but sadly it was true), Rookie suddenly brought me out of that slump. Remember The Rebirth? That was courtesy of Tavi's new influence on my life. If you've never read the online magazine before, let me sum it up. It is the pre-, current, and post-adolescent girl's guide to life. There is nearly everything on there that you need or want to know, are curious about, care even a smidgen about, didn't know was a thing but now you do, and everything in between. There's one void that I intend to fill myself because they accept reader submissions, but of course I will let you know if and when that happens. 

I feel as though I have a personal connection to Tavi. We're both fashion bloggers, short teenage girls, born only around a year apart, are writers, enjoy singing (she's in an a cappella group, aka my dream), have an unfounded fascination in tulle (her personal 8tracks username is tulletulle and her twitter is @tavitulle), and have a multitude of other insignificant things in common. Tavi is my role model more than everyone I've ever praised on this blog, including Emma Watson and Alexa Chung, because she embodies everything I value and admire in a human being. She tries not to care what everyone else thinks about her; she began blogging at age eleven and had shaken hands with Björk and Marc Jacobs by age thirteen; she singlehandedly made looking like a pubescent grandma cool; she is a phenomenal writer; she created Rookie and subsequently coalesced the most unexpected combination of interesting people; she does all of this and is still in high school; and above all, she is a human being, and totally owns up to it. Tavi admits to her flaws and publicizes them to make everyone else feel better. The rawness and honesty of Rookie is what draws me to it. Those thoughts you thought were unutterable but desperately wished weren't are suddenly on your computer screen (and now in print!). It's easy to idolize someone you know nothing about. I know absolutely zero things about Alexa Chung except that she looks awesome always, yet I have managed to mention her frequently enough on this site that she has her own tag. She could be a terrible person (although I doubt she is), and I would never know because there's no way I could unless I spoke to her in person. And even then I would have to become very close to her to really know her. But with Tavi, you read her articles for Rookie and you have complete faith that she is real. And that's comforting. 

When I stood in front of her at a small independent bookstore in SoHo, I was more starstruck than I've ever been in my entire life. You all can see on this blog how many famous people I've met or seen just in the past year and a half: it's an unfairly large number. Based on my frequent caption: "I had a mini heart attack," used when describing an encounter with a renowned figure, it's obvious how easily affected I am by celebrities. I saw Tavi and I kid you not, I almost started crying. And it takes a lot to make me cry. I told her how much a worship her and she was so honored. I don't remember exactly how she responded, but it seemed very genuine. Amy Rose was sitting right next to her and heard everything I'd said, and when I'd finished and Tavi placed my copy of the Yearbook into Amy Rose's lap, she said, "You're so sweet. Gimme a hug." So I hugged her, my arms full of a huge pink bag of crap and a Sports Authority plastic bag housing an obnoxiously bright orange shoebox, both of which definitely hit someone. I apologized for my physical awkwardness, but no one seemed to care that I'd whacked them with a cardboard prism. 

The moral of the story is: I love Rookie, and so can you. 

[Photos by me.]

Amy Rose kicked off the night of Yearbook-excerpt reading with a piece she wrote about her love of The Smiths. She confidently rocked a cut-up tee shirt, exposed cheetah print bra, and a floral print apron while talking about how Morrissey's lyrics became the foundation of one weird night with a college guy.

Jenny Zhang, a writer and poet (and obviously a Rookie contributor) that grew up around my general neighborhood and read a surprisingly beautiful fiction piece. I have recently invested a lot of time into reading her work on the Interwebz, but I intend to get my hands on her poetry book soon.

Yes, that is Lena Dunham, sitting mere feet away from me talking about her Millenium Journal and all of the crazy things she thought were important in the year 2000. 

The girl-band Supercute! playing some really jammin' tunes on their ukeleles and that cool box-drum-seat hybrid, despite the fact that I am usually opposed to ukeleles. They're actually really cool, and--get this--super cute. 

Tavi. Fuqing. Gevinson. Does she or does she not look like a dark Wiccan princess hiding many secrets in her endless braid? She read an excerpt of her famous piece, "How to Not Care What Other People Think of You."

If you still can't comprehend how incredible this night was, let me put it this way: I wasn't even hungry. I am that person who is often hungry but doesn't usually do anything about it because I am very scheduled when it comes to eating so when I don't eat according to my regular timetable the world turns upside down. I plan my day around my meals. The fact that I was not hungry means that my emotions surpassed the standardized needs of my stomach. 

As if this post wasn't already long enough, here's your Sunday playlist. Rookie-themed, of course. 

Have a Rookie week. Just have one.

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